The Salt Shaker and The Angry Lady

Thursday, January 19, 2012


This afternoon Ace, Mimi (my mom), and I went to enjoy a nice lunch at Guadalajara. All was pleasant, and we were enjoying our conversation. My little salt fiend, Ace, was quietly attempting to salt her wheat tortilla, but nothing was coming out. I attempted to unclog the shaker, but still, nada. So I got up and switched our dud of a salt shaker with one on the empty table next to us.
{Exhibit A}

Then all of the sudden a lady at a nearby table jumps out of her seat as if she is rushing to save someone's life, swipes the stubborn salt shaker that I had traded out, and comes and gets right up in our faces. I'm like, "whoa, what is going on here, crazy?" (No, I didn't actually say that).
I can picture her face so vividly. She was so angry. Here is a good representation of what she looked like as she began to scold us.


Angry Lady: "You guys know he put that in his mouth?!" (In a furious voice-- as if someone had just thrown rocks at her cat)

Me: {incredibly confused} "Umm ex-squeeze me?" (Okay so I really just said "huh", but "ex-squeeze me" would have been so much more awesome)

Angry Lady: "He (referring to Ace) put this in his mouth (angrily holding up Exhibit A) and was licking it....my friend saw him do it." (She even demonstrated with her hand how Ace tilted up the salt shaker as if she was drinking from it- really weird, lady.)

(I look over at her friend who has her head down at their table, obviously embarrassed of the scene her lunch date was making)

Me: "Okay, first of all, this is a girl, and you don't need to be so rude."

Angry Lady: "I'm not trying to be rude (in the nastiest voice ever) but he had this in his mouth." (Yes, still referring to my girly girl as a boy)

Me: "Again, she is a girl, and you are being incredibly rude."

Angry Lady: "Here, maybe you should take this!" (Slams the faulty shaker down onto our table)

Me: "Um. Okay."

She took two or three very aggressive steps and was back in her seat.

Here's the deal- Did Ace's mouth come in contact with the top of the salt shaker? Quite possibly. It couldn't have been a complete slobber fest as Angry Lady made it seem, considering that my mom and I were both sitting right there, and didn't even see her attempt to sprinkle salt in her mouth. And besides, we are talking about a (mostly) mature 3 and a half year old, not a teething infant.

Secondly, okay maybe you are a huge germaphobe, and the thought of someone else using a salt shaker that a kid's mouth had been on made you feel called to action. I get it. Well, there were plenty of other ways you could have handled the situation without being a complete jerk. (I am using nicer terms than I want to because my Grandma reads my blog....Hi Gigi!)

If I were one who cared a great deal about germs, (which is a big if because I have just never been too concerned with them), here are some ways I would have handled the situation so as to not make a scene or ruin another person's lunch (I don't think any of our meals tasted as good after the encounter with Angry Lady):
1. Quietly and discreetly grab the contaminated shaker off of the table and then give it to my waiter, explaining that it needed to be cleaned.
2. Nicely got the attention of the salt licking kid's mom and said something like "oops, I actually think she might have put her mouth on that shaker"--- in a very sweet and playful voice so as to not make anyone feel bad. (Also being sure to get the child's gender correct). I mean, kids lick things, no big deal. I wouldn't have minded that. No need for an adult sized temper tantrum.
3. Quietly tell my waiter what had happened, and have them take care of it.

I truly just do not understand people like Angry Lady. Why are you so angry? How could that have possibly made you turn into such a mean person? Who knows. Lately I have been seeing a lot of rude and angry people. While driving, shopping, whatever it is. I just wanna say, "hey relax. It's all good- there are much bigger problems than me inadvertently blocking the intersection where you want to turn, accidentally cutting you off in HEB because I can't control the ridiculous oversized shopping cart/car my kids insist on getting, or whether or not my child's mouth touched the top of the corona bottle salt shaker.

What's even worse is when I did accidentally block the intersection, I waved and mouthed, "I AM SO SORRY" to you, and you still gave me the finger. Or when I cut you off with my giant yellow car cart, I said "Ahh so sorry can't control this thing", and you still just rolled your eyes and snubbed me.

Finally, how could you mistake this beauty for a boy??

"Who you callin' a boy??"
"You mess with my sister, you mess with me"

Keep Calm and Carry On.
Lots of Love!
Lisa

12 comments:

Jessica said...

Hi Gigi! (awesome!)

Stupid ugly mean angry lady! What a jerk!

Alicia Llanas said...

first i found interesting that a bottle of beer was converted in a salt shaker :)

then,wow with that lady, crazyyyyy

she doesnt look like a boy at all

and the last picture priceless!

Jonana said...

First of all, ok, maybe she didn't pay attention and thought Ace was a boy. I'll give her that AT FIRST. But when you corrected her and she kept calling her a "he", that's just weird. Second, I don't know why people get so angry like that. I just have to think they are way angry about everything in their lives if they'll go off on you like that about a salt shaker. Sorry you had to go through that. Finally, we had that to happen at a restaurant once (not the angry neighbor thing). Our son put his mouth on the salt shaker. When the waitress came to the table the next time, we told her about it so that she could take it to the kitchen to have them clean it. We laughed about it later saying, you know she just took that thing, walked off and then just put it down on the next table that didn't have a salt shaker on it....

Jonana said...

That's so funny, Alicia! When I saw that picture, I didn't think a thing about it because all of the Mexican restaurants in this area (Tennessee/North Mississippi) keep their salt in that exact bottle. It's so fun to follow blogs from different parts of the country to find out what is normal to some people and what is strange to somebody else!

erikatx said...

so weird... although somewhat funny! And who could ever be so angry in the presence of such a precious face! She obviously has other issues... we'll just pray for her!lol

and love that last picture!

Beverly Keener said...

I'm afraid someone forgot their medication. Seriously.

Anonymous said...

Aaaawww yeah, tell me all about it! I've worked 3 years in a pharmacy and I regularly had customers like that. I think you are right, it IS getting more common. And I am not talking about young people without manners, I'm talking about middle aged people being the worst.
Like a 60-something man slamming his fist on the counter and screaming when I told him his favorite brand of cold medicine had been discontinued.

Like, If that's your biggest problem, I'm very envious of you. For me personally my infertility is my biggest problem, but I guess we all have different perspectives on life...

I love how you picked a stock pic to demonstrate the look on her face! Haha!

Seriously though. Forget about it.
//Anna

Anonymous said...

As a random person who just stumbled across this blog, I will say it is pretty gross that your kid is slobbering on a restaurant salt shaker. That's obviously not sanitary. I understand you're a busy mom and have other things to deal with, but given that you admitted you noticed it, you really should have done something other than just put it on another table, where anyone could get your little darling's slobber in their food. It's more your responsibility to handle the situation than another table's.

Put another way, if a cook in the kitchen was slobbering all over your food, you'd be totally okay with that? You're biased cause it's your kid and you see/interact with his slobber all the time, but other people shouldn't have to.

Having said all that, obviously crazy lady was crazy, and you were absolutely correct to point out that she should have dealt with it in a much, MUCH more appropriate way. But I'm really think you're neglecting your responsibility to try your best to make sure other diners aren't running a risk of getting sick from your darling's slobber.

Anonymous said...

Oh, and worth noting that Jonana (commenter) did the appropriate thing and flagged the waiter herself, rather than just switching the shakers. Bravo, Jonana.

Lisa said...

Hey Anonymous--- You might want to read a bit more closely....I said NEITHER MY MOM NOR MYSELF NOTICED HER WITH THE SHAKER ANYWHERE NEAR HER MOUTH-- Had I seen that, I would have absolutely taken care of it.
Thank you for your concern though, but next time, please make sure you read correctly!
Thanks!
Lisa

Lisa said...

Oh and you think that I put the shaker on the other table BECAUSE I saw her suck on it?? WOW-- did you even read the post?? I moved it to another table because it wasnt working. I would never do that! haha.

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